Over our lifetime many of us will find ourselves in a caregiving position at some point. Some of us may be caring for children with disabilities or complex medical conditions, some of us may be caring for a spouse with an illness, while others may be caring for our aging parents. Both females and males, at any age in their life, can suddenly become a caregiver. This is most often not a choice you make, but one that is placed upon you out of love for your family member because they need the extra support, or they are unable to care for themselves. You want to be there for them and provide them with the care they need because you love them and know what is best for them.
While caregiving may be done out of love, it very often can also become a challenging task. Depending on the level of care that is needed, it can quickly become overwhelming and exhausting. There are so many ways in which a caregiver may be affected, and therefore it is important that the caregiver is also supported.
Caregiver stress is experienced by all caregivers. As we care for our loved one there is often a strain on family relationships and friendships, leading to social isolation. You may experience a financial burden or stress over navigating the medical system. Caregiving can often put a strain on your body physically. Often major changes must happen in daily routines or living arrangements. All these factors can lead to emotional concerns and can leave the caregiver feeling angry, lonely, afraid, frustrated, depressed, guilty, or helpless.
Support for the caregiver is very important because when caregiving stress is not managed properly, it can quickly lead to caregiver burnout. Burnout may show up with symptoms such as a constant fatigue or lack of energy, difficulties with sleeping, irritability, frustration or anger, poor concentration, withdrawal from family and friends, anxiety or depression. These may all be signs that too much stress (or responsibility) is being put on the caregiver.
It is very important to care for yourself and not to ignore the symptoms in order to avoid a caregiver burnout. When you recognize that you are feeling stressed, take a break from the care that you are giving. Studies show that physical activity helps reduce stress and improves mood. Do not be afraid to ask for help when care giving becomes too much. Writing your thoughts and feelings in a journal may be helpful to some, while sharing those thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend or counsellor may be more beneficial to others. Each caregiver may find a different way of reducing their stress, but what is important is that some time is taken each week to focus on your own health.
One of the most common challenges of being a caregiver is the guilt that is experienced; feeling guilty for not being able to handle the challenges. You may experience guilt for not being able to fix the situation or for thinking you might be making wrong decisions. You may feel guilty for having to step away to take a little time for yourself, guilty for feeling frustrated, tired, overwhelmed, stressed, and so many other feelings. The cycle of guilt can drain your energy, make you feel like a failure, or make you unable to cope.
If you are a caregiver and may be experiencing caregiver stress, caregiver burnout, or caregiver guilt, you also are not alone! Caregivers Alberta (www.caregiversalberta.ca) is there to guide you through your caregiving journey. This website has several resources available to caregivers, as well as contacts to professionals that are ready to give advice and support along the way. If you just need a listening ear, reach out to one of our Guiding Hands members and they would be willing to support you in that way. Together we can bear one another’s burdens.
